I often feel empty. But I know there are things I can do to fill in the gaps. I choose not to do those things. I blame this on my lack of motivation. It would be fantastic to have so much motivation and waste no time on procrastination.

And I'd naturally think about how I can build up my motivation.

That's a good start. No, I mean, that's only a start. I'm not too sure if that can possibly be a 'good' start. I say this because I merely think about how to build up my motivation. The motivation to do things. To take a further step and to get out of the comfort zone. Not easy. Or rather, it occurs rather rarely.

Then I'd envy those who seem to possess enormous will power. I wonder how they do it. It must be some kind of inborn quality. They say you achieve it through making efforts. But how do you make efforts if you're simply unable to do it. Or rather, if it just doesn't happen in your life? Then I give up. I just tell myself that's just how it is. I wasn't born with the gift.

Or sometimes I'd just do it (whatever that is).